school ain’t testing nothing but my patience
humans are fucking pathetic look at this little nigga come out of his egg on his own no crying no helpless “wah wah cut my umbilical cord” bullshit he come out and he already on the hunt for reptilian pussy no fear no games. and we’re the evolved species? smh
woke up to a blood stain on my bedsheets wtf
this is literally the best post ever
Yesterday was my grandparents 45th anniversary and my grandma was like “if I had killed him 20 years ago I would be out of jail by now” and that basically sums them up
Your grandma is 45?!
yeah she got married the day she was born
"all we need is your credit card information"
im a wimp when it comes to waxing my legs so i figured out a way to do it.
@keatonstromberg - I enjoy my bed. (◡‿◡✿)
but if a playground doesn’t have swings is it really even a playground. or is it just. a disappointment
my pet hamster needs to chill